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Thursday, October 22, 2009

This Is Where I Go

When my head is cloudy, I'm upset and don't know what to do, I go to a special place where I feel like I can find all the answers. It's calming, peaceful, and everything in the world seems right when I'm there. When I'm unsure about doing something, I go here and the answer comes to me...like someone is telling me the right thing to do...leading me. This is a place very few people know about, I know when I head up there, that no one will be there...except who I want.


This is the view from the hill of where I go. It's beautiful. It overlooks the area I live. This has a special meaning to me. I haven't spoke about going here before, because it's so personal. But today I wanted to share my special place with everyone. This is a hill about 5minutes from where I live, if you look in the middle, towards the mountains...that's where my little town sits. What you don't see in the picture above is the reason I go there...the reason I feel calmness...the reason I always feel the answers come to me. Because behind where I stood to take that picture...is this....



That's my Nanny's headstone. Grace L. Eaton, the woman who raised me til I was 10 when she died. She is laid to rest on top of that hill, she overlooks my town...which means she is overlooking me and my kids. By the way, you will noticed Arthur R. Eaton's birthday may sound familiar to some of you who pay attention...that is Jaxon's birthday. I don't remember him, I was only 1 when he passed away. It's amazing, I stand in front of this headstone, and everything seems right...it's like Nanny is standing there with me and helping me with whatever the reason is I went up there. This is the woman who meant the world to me...still does. She is the closest thing to a mother I ever had growing up...and she's gone...it's still hard to cope with it...14years later. I love her, I miss her, I have a hard time living without her. What keeps me going most days is being to my kids, what she was to me.

I remember everything about the day she was laid to rest...I was standing almost behind the other headstone in the above picture...there were chairs and a tent in front...they wanted the grand kids to stand in the back (she had 5 grand kids, and 1 great grandson) I stood with my older cousin (the one who had Nanny's great grandson) and I buried my head into her side as the final prayer was being said. I still cry when I go there. And every time as I'm leaving...I look back as I go through the gate and this is what always brings a smile through the tears.....


Knowing she's in that cemetery...looking over me. She has an awesome view from here.

5 comments:

LiveLaughLoveCj said...

Oh Jackie....

(hug) my friend, simple, quiet hugs!

•´.¸¸.•¨¯`♥.Erin.♥´¯¨•.¸¸.´• said...

Sounds like the perfect place to reflect, sit, and just be.

I know she's there with you when you're on your hill. That is why it is so comforting and peaceful.

Thank you for sharing with us.

~*~ Melissa ~*~ said...

Aww, big hugs to you hun. I am so sorry for your loss. I had a hard time coping with the loss of my grandmother too, so I can relate in a snese. I'm here if u ever want or need to talk :)

Kristin said...

HUGS jackie!

mommaof3 said...

BIG HUGS

 
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